Trigger Warning….please be mindful of any triggers related to child abuse, physical abuse, or sexual abuse when reading this post. Not trying to be explicit, but any words or descriptions might cause trouble.
I’ve been practicing self care since the last post. A lot of sleeping and a lot of cooking have brought my energy levels back up. One load of laundry, a potential new apartment interview, taking care of taxes, knitting, and essay writing rounded out the rest of my physical self care strategies this weekend. Meditation, deep breathing, a mindful walk, sensory grounding, and a call to the hotline rounded out my mental self care.
What I’m still struggling with:
Body memory and body self care. In the last post, I mentioned how much the treatment impacted my body. What I didn’t realize was the consequences of that impact.
- Less physical pain around my face, neck, and spine
- Less swelling around my sinuses, ears, neck, and abdomen
- More yucky stuff (aka toxins) getting released
- More feeling in my legs and other muscle groups that have been numb for a while
- Improved temperature regulation
- Improved sleep
- Odd tingling pain and discomfort from hips (and are between) to toes that is starting to go away
- Extreme tiredness and lack of energy immediately after treatment
- Lots of recovered memories and memory fragments piecing together while awake and asleep
- Had to take a “mental health day”
- Tenderness in private parts that feels uncomfortable and triggering – don’t know how to cope with it
- Increased visits to the bathroom that interrupt my sleep and feel oddly uncomfortable because the previously mentioned tender parts are affected.
I really need to talk with my intern practitioner about these sensations; glad Tuesday is only two days away. And after that conversation, I may break my rule and ask my counselor to call me between sessions. This discomfort is not something I’ve ever had to cope with long term and starting to distress me.
Other than that, I’m feeling pretty good about the self care.
Thanks for reading.