Celebrate a new year of beginnings and endings

Anniversaries: 2019 Year in Review and Looking Forward to 2020

Gratitude

First, thanks to all my guests for continuing to visit Untangled Connections in spite of challenges that made posting regularly difficult.

I appreciate all of you and your contributions towards keeping this website and blog safe for any guests who visit anonymously.

And thank you for keeping my identity safe too as I shared more and more of myself with you all.

Recovery Cycles and Transitions

Back when I started this blog in 2014, I referenced a book called Trauma and Recovery by Judith Herman. It was a pivotal resource in my recovery shared with me just after I started graduate school in 2006-2007. The book was updated in 2015, but original concepts remain the same.

Ms. Herman’s concepts about recovery and healing as a cyclical journey that often overlaps remain the cornerstones of my healing process. What I call “survival mode”, she refers to as “establishing safety” or part 1 in the recovery process. Part 2 (Remembrance and Mourning) and Part 3 (Reconnection) are concepts I didn’t really understand back then, but kept in the back of my mind.

I didn’t have much hope back then. And dreaming that my life might not be dominated by the past was too scary.

Parts 2 and 3: What to Write?

Recovery Part 2: Remembrance and Mourning began with Untangled Connections in 2014 even though I didn’t realize it then. I started sharing my story with the hope of helping others in similar positions in spite of my overriding fear of talking about the past. If you’ve been reading these posts for a while, you might remember that I’ve gone back and forth between Recovery Part 1 and Part 2; often working through challenges in both cycles at the same time.

2018/2019 began my entry into Part 3: Reconnection as I shared some of the most painful secrets that kept me apart from my family of origin all these years here.

That sharing of secrets made me feel extremely vulnerable as I juggled what to write here and how to cope with family of origin re-entering my life. Then work got busy with many new challenges, and I started working on case studies for aromatherapy certification. All the while, I struggled with pain management as the body memories got worse in some ways and better in others. What worked before didn’t work anymore, and I spent a lot of time experimenting with different kinds of alternative medicine and coping techniques to find strategies that did help.

In spite of all that, I felt (and continue to feel) happy, loving, grateful, full of laughter about my life. So how could I write about that here and make it relevant or meaningful? You could say I felt scared and vulnerable to the point where ideas dried up. You could say I wasn’t sure if the changes in my recovery and stories I had to share adhered to the values and themes of this blog. You could also say that I was scared about what to write and how to approach certain topics when I knew family members, friends, and connections would be reading these posts.

As much as I wanted to keep up my usual routine, it got to be too overwhelming. I couldn’t keep up with balancing self care, family re-integration, work, and this blog. So I reduced the volunteer work and blogging to increase self care and work on my family relationships.

Changes in 2020 – Rebranding, New Readers, and Scent Reflections

First, I’ve “come out” to my parents and certain other family members about having alter personalities and many struggles associated with my past. My parents accepted the truth with respect and asked to learn more about those experiences. I decided to share Untangled Connections with them in 2020 and also my favorite book about alter personalities: Amongst Ourselves by Tracy Alderman to learn more about Dissociative Identity Disorder.

Second, Untangled Connections has some limitations in order to stay safe and anonymous. That means I can’t sell products, offer consulting services, or offer educational tools that answer guest questions in depth to help pay for all the work and expenses that go into creating Untangled Connections. For example: more posts about starting a blog, creating a website using WordPress or similar products, and writing.

That brings me to the third and final change: re-branding Untangled Connections as part of my small business Scent Reflections: Trauma-informed, integrated healing support through aromatherapy.

Scent Reflections is still in development even though all the paperwork is in place. I’m working on an aromatherapy product line to help with panic attacks and pain relief that is portable, discreet, and affordable. My goal is to open for business next summer in 2020.

Between then and now, I plan to start posting information about:

  • aromatherapy, essential oils, and herbs
    • How they support health and wellness goals in every day life
    • Recipes for DIY blends
    • How to integrate these concepts and techniques into existing coping techniques and strategies
  • Different kinds of sensory grounding strategies
    • Expand on the self protection series from earlier this year
    • Share meditation techniques
    • Offer more affirmations and quotes
  • Share writing, blogging, and website development tips

As for Untangled Connections, you may see some changes to the theme colors and and the Scent Reflections logo added on different pages. I will continue posting about the usual topics here too. What I post on Scent Reflections is relevant here, but not everything here is relevant to Scent Reflections. So I’ll be re-posting some Scent Reflections articles here too.

Finally, I will be creating some “business” social media accounts for Scent Reflections that include sections for Untangled Connections too. It’s going to be a lot of work on top of my regular job and life, but definitely worth the effort.

Thank you in advance for being patient with me as these changes roll out. I invite you all to visit Scent Reflections and learn more about my work there in your own time. The first post will go out a week from today.

Thanks for reading