An extra post this week…seemed important
Today has been one of those stressful, difficult days when everything seems designed to send a person straight into a panic attack or relapse. Luckily for me, I had good friends and safety plans in place to help me out. And I also got the bonus of cuddle time with a canine friend – safe, respectful touch.
That brings me to the point of this post.
Many survivors of trauma have a fear of or aversion to touch and physical contact. I know I do. And that isolation (touch isolation as termed in the article) hurts. Safe, respectful touch is considered one of the basic human needs. I get mine from canine and feline friends, acupuncture/body work, and massage with trusted professionals. Sometimes friends are allowed to give and receive hugs too, but rarely.
However, there is also another group who is isolated from being able to give and receive safe, respectful touch: males of all ages in our culture/society.
A friend of mine shared this article on Facebook:
It explains so much in a thoughtful, respectful, compassionate way. The author is a man writing to both genders about the importance of bringing safe, respectful touch back to society. Platonic touch that offers affection, caring, and gentle without being sexual, aggressive, or violent. Male to male. Male to female. Female to male. Female to female.
why share now?
I was still feeling low and triggered, trying to find something to help me relax and let go of the shame when this popped up. I read the comments first. Then I read the article. The contents resonated with the vulnerability I felt after dealing with the unexpected stressors.
I empathized with this man and all of the other males in the world who also felt the effects of this isolation. Through this empathy, I felt validated and connected to a group instead of isolated and alone in thinking this way.
I feel compassion and empathy for anyone who lacks safe, respectful touch in their lives. Personal experience shows me how much I am missing out on. Some day, I hope to have that in my life again – with humans and animals. And I wish for anyone who craves platonic , safe, respectful, affectionate, mutually shared touch among friends and relatives receives it.
How do you indulge your need for safe, respectful touch?
thanks for reading